Al Gore and his Global Warming myths have officially reached a new level of absurdity. This time the arrogance and condescending ignorance surpasses anything anyone could have imagined. I advise anyone reading this to remove any sharp objects from your vicinity; this is going to get really ugly.

This Saturday, we will all be showered with the best liberalism has to offer. On Saturday, Al Gore and a bunch of rock stars will be putting on a world Concert, “Live Earth.” This concert, of course, is going to cool the planet. Yes, after all the people around the globe are done getting stoned out of their minds at a rock concert, they are all going to help pass liberal policies that will save the Planet from Global Warming. Those who attend the concert will promise to pressure their country to sign treaties to cut global warming “pollution,” personally reduce carbon dioxide “pollution” (I assume by taping their mouths shut) and plant trees, among other things.

According to Al Gore, the concert’s aim is to “trigger a global movement to solve the climate crisis.” “The tipping point in the political system will come when the majority of the people are armed with enough knowledge about the crisis and its solutions that they make this cause their own. “Then, you will see the entire political system shift dramatically.” “This is going to be the greenest event of its kind, ever.”

To make the people attending the concert really believe they are accomplishing anything, and to remove their guilt: 1) all electricity that powers the shows will be from renewable sources; 2) concessionaires will be encouraged to use suppliers of biodegradable plastics; 3) waste will be minimized through recycling and reuse; 4) venue offices will use as little energy as possible (I guess this means candlelight); 5) production lighting will include the use of LED light bulbs; 6) staff and artist air travel will be offset through carbon credits; 7) and ground travel will be hybrid or high-efficiency vehicles where possible.

Evidently, all these meaningless implementations were not good enough for PETA, the most orthodox of the environmentalists. PETA has asked that no meat products be served at any of the concerts either. According to PETA, no environmentalists eat meat. So overall, this is a rock concert under candlelight, with no hamburgers and hot dogs, performed by former and present drug addicts with their mouths taped shut, teaching others how to save the Earth. If there is any indication that environmentalism is a religion, I rest my case.

Now that you have absorbed all this nonsense, let us attempt to examine Al Gore’s logic. The concert is going to be performed at 8 locations around the world. In order for people to attend these concerts, they are going to have to increase their air travel. The rock stars will need to drive around in limos. According to Al Gore, those airplanes and limos will increase the temperature of the Earth. Moreover, many of the rock stars will likely take private jets. So, to combat this warming of the Earth, these rock stars are going to pay fraudulent companies who sell carbon credits to plant trees for them. Very likely Al Gore will recommend the company of which he is President, so that he can make a killing off other people’s guilt. Furthermore, by using renewable energy, hybrids, and LED light bulbs, this will offset the half of a degree that the Earth has supposedly increased over the past hundred years.

Moreover, we all get the pleasure of being lectured about the intricacies of the climate, not by brilliant scientists from NASA or MIT, but from the great scientific minds of Madonna, Kanye West, Bon Jovi, Sheryl Crow, Sting, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Kelly Clarkson and others.

Thankfully, however, our next generation of rock stars seems to be getting the point. A new British band Arctic Monkeys, basically said it would be a little hypocritical to have them as the spokespeople to save the planet since they are merely rock stars. Moreover, they admit to flying in jets all the time.

Lastly, I leave you with an interesting scientific news story that just came out recently. “Scientists who probed two kilometers (1.2 miles) through a Greenland glacier to recover the oldest plant DNA on record said Thursday the planet was far warmer hundreds of thousands of years ago than is generally believed.” Apparently, the consensus is over regarding manmade global warming when Al Gore debates with the likes of Laurie David and other mind numb robots, but actual scientists clearly think Al Gore is an embarrassment to science.

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